You Are Never Too Weak for Him

Dear Little Sister,
When I was growing up, my family did a pretty good job of reading the scriptures together. My parents were also great at making sure that we always read individually before we went to bed. Much of my love for the scriptures came from the righteous example of my parents.

     One of the advantages we had as a homeschooling family was that we could have family study whenever we wanted, at whatever time of day that would ensure people were awake and/or happy to take a break from math. We had a system: everybody reads two verses in the Book of Mormon. That's one of the slowest possible ways to ever finish the book or remember the larger context behind the passages, but we were young, and it was enough. One day, however, when I was six or seven, my mom decided to switch it up.
     As we all gathered in a circle, my mom told us that just once, instead of normal reading, she would like to hear our favorite scriptures. My siblings all raced through the pages with smiles on their faces, and I was so confused.
     How could I possibly have a favorite scripture? It's not that I loved too many—I had absolutely no idea how anyone could remember where to find them. How could you know exactly what the scriptures said and exactly how to get there? That just seemed like such a crazy level of scriptural scholarship that I would never achieve.
     That day, I chose a scripture on page 11 of the Book of Mormon, because 11 is my favorite number. It was 1 Nephi 5:22, which you can unpack and learn some stuff from, but it wasn't at all like the scriptures my siblings knew. I was so impressed with them.

     Twelve years later, I recited my 100th Scripture Mastery and won my fourth consecutive scripture chase competition. Soon after, I was well-known in my MTC district and throughout my mission as a scriptorian and Gospel scholar. God made my weakness a defining strength.
     When I received my mission call, I was terrified. Since the age of five, I had attempted to learn the Spanish language. I had grown up in a Mexican environment with Hispanic family in a city barely an hour north of Mexico, yet I couldn't speak Spanish. Just like with the scriptures, I had proven to myself that I was able to learn things. I had learned to love learning, and I could master just about anything you put in front me because I was willing to work for it—except Spanish. No matter how hard I tried, how many years I studied, or how many classes I took (even in college), I just couldn't figure it out, not even passably.
     While most people long to serve their missions in a foreign country and belittle those who serve stateside, I begged God to keep me in the States. And if I had to leave, I asked to be sent to Scotland or Ireland, somewhere where I wouldn't have to learn another language. I mean, if I couldn't even learn Spanish, the second language of America and certainly of Southern California, how could I possibly learn any other?
     Like always, God heard my prayers. But He didn't answer the way I wanted Him to.
     I got my call to Chile and tried to be okay with it, but it was hard. I was scared. I prayed and fasted for peace, but I felt so incompetent. Finally, within a week of my departure, I asked my dad for a priesthood blessing. In it, among other things, he said, "You will learn Spanish, and you'll master it. In fact, you'll do it quickly." That promise kept me going for many months to follow.
     By the end of my mission, I was one of three gringo Elders generally said to have had the best Spanish in the mission. In under two years, God had loosened my tongue and made a miracle in my life, helping me overcome my worst fear that I had failed to defeat in over six times as long of trying.
     I hope you don't take either of these stories as bragging. I'm nothing without God, and I don't think much of myself for what I was able to do. I worked longer and harder than I ever have in my life to learn the scriptures and to learn Spanish, but it wasn't until God stepped in that I could make that search meaningful. The bottom line is this:
     God can make much more out of you than you could ever imagine—if you're willing to work for it.
     One of the biggest disadvantages to writing you like this is that I don't get to hear your thoughts. What do you struggle with? What have you always struggled with? What do you wish you could do that no matter how hard you try, it just seems like you'll never get there? Whatever it is, remember the promise of the Lord that He will make weak things become strong for us (see Ether 12:27). His only two conditions are that we be humble and that we have faith.
     True faith in Christ involves knowing who He is and trusting what He can do; it's believing that He can take you even at your lowest and make something out of you.

     True humility isn't being down on yourself and feeling like you'll never be enough; it's knowing that you can defeat even the most difficult challenge, but only if you do so with God.
     With so many things that God expects of us, it's easy to feel like we'll never measure up. I'm as guilty as any of breaking the commandments to be of good cheer and to love ourselves despite our weaknesses. It's hard to be imperfect before a Father with such high expectations. But in moments of clarity, I remember how good the Lord has been to me, and I remember that He loves me no matter what. I still stand all amazed at all of it—His love, His sacrifice, His salvation. It truly is wonderful.
     But most of all, it's true. Never forget that it's true. God will make so much more of you than you could ever imagine—if you're willing to work for it. And He'll do it because He loves you. You were enough for Him in Gethsemane, and you always will be.
     No matter how weak, you are enough for Him.

"The enabling and strengthening aspect of the Atonement helps us to see and to do and to become good in ways that we could never recognize or accomplish with our limited mortal capacity. I testify and witness that the enabling power of the Savior’s Atonement is real. ... Truly, brothers and sisters, in the strength of the Lord we can do and endure and overcome all things."
- Elder David A. Bednar, Quorum of the Twelve Apostles (2004 - )





Konrie's Korner:

One year at Girls Camp, I couldn't resist telling one of my friends, Bridgette, how amazing she was at something  (I no longer remember what it was) and how I wanted to be more like her. She kinda laughed and told me something I couldn't believe: she had been working on developing that attribute because she wanted to be more like me... How was it that we could so easily see the good in each other yet fail to notice the virtue in ourselves?

I firmly believe people are inherently good, which includes myself. I am striving to count my strengths as often as I count my weaknesses and view each as a stepping stone to a better me.