To Know God

Dear Little Sister,
You gave us a prompt! I was so so SO happy when Konrie told me that you asked for something specifically. It makes my job easier, but it also makes me feel like I'm helping you more, which is the whole point. I can ramble for days, as you know, but this blog is meant to answer any of your questions and give you encouragement as you face this new chapter of your life. So thanks for asking us to help you!
     Your question was fantastic--something that's really made me think today--and God was so good throughout church today, giving me one little piece at a time of what He wanted me to say (at least that's  how it felt). For the folks at home, you wanted to know more ways to see Christ in your life every day and come closer to Him besides prayer and scripture study. What a great question. That question and honestly seeking the answer (which may change slightly depending on your circumstances) will keep a fire alive and burning in your heart throughout your life; it will keep you active in the Church, and it will keep you and your family striving down the road toward Heaven. That's the attitude you need to have, and I'm so pleased that you already have it.
     Plus, I know you're smart. I know it's something you've thought about and probably come up with answers for already. And I can see the proper foundation of your testimony in doing the littler things, like reading the scriptures and praying. That's a good place to start, and rather than branch out like you asked, I've actually felt that I need to dig deeper today.
     Are you familiar with the concept of B.A.M., Basic Answers for Mormons? I remember my friend, Lindsay, calling them that all the time, and I've heard different versions of it everywhere I've lived, like "Primary Answers," so I think it's fairly ubiquitous or universal. Anyway, if we're on the same page, you're now thinking of prayer, reading the scriptures, going to church, keeping the commandments, going to the temple, service, etc. You get a few more answers as you get older, but even as a young child, those are the answers we know by heart and they never really go away. As adults, they're the first things listed as well. Why? Because they work. They're just as true for adults as they are for children, and we never stop needing to improve them and give ourselves more time and focus for them. How can you be happier? B.A.M.! How can you feel the Spirit more? B.A.M.! How can you strengthen your testimony? B.A.M.! And the list never ends. So how can you feel closer to Christ and think of Him more frequently? Well...let's talk about that.
     I remember one of my many bishops, Bishop Cook, telling me when I was about thirteen that when he talked to people who were struggling or on the brink of inactivity in the gospel, he always asked them the same first question: are you reading your scriptures and praying daily? When someone's testimony and resolve were shaking, when they couldn't handle any more, he said, the answer was "no" 90-95% percent of the time. I've confirmed this with other bishops and even my mission president, curious to see if the principle holds up, and it does. 90-95% of the people who fall away or seriously fall down give up prayer and scripture study.

     I don't know what the exact numbers are because they vary depending on where you look, but I've heard a lot of reports (and I'm sure you have too) that around 25% of returned missionaries no longer participate in the Church. Another study approximates that roughly 80% of Church members will go inactive at some point in their lives. Less than half of the men or boys baptized into the Church ever receive the Melchizedek Priesthood worldwide. Those numbers are heartbreaking, yet I can't help but think of Bishop Cook's lesson every time I hear them. As my mission president, President Warne, often said, "You never find a less-active member who still reads the Book of Mormon every day and pays their tithing." In order to get lost in forbidden paths, the people in Lehi's dream first had to let go of and forget about the rod, which is the word of God.
     Like I said, I want to dig deeper, so this isn't just about whether or not you read and pray. This is about how and why. What makes you turn to God?
     I had a lot of amazing seminary teachers, and one of them--a substitute, Sister Packard--said something so profound that I've never forgotten. We were reading John 17:3, "And this is life eternal, that they might know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent." She then commented, "To know God is to be like God." Think about that for a second. To know God is to be like God. God's work and glory is to bring to pass our eternal life, and life eternal is to know God, and to know God is to be like God. So God's work and glory is to help us become more like Him. That's His purpose. So how do we do that?
     One of my favorite scriptures is in Mosiah 5, and it reads, "For how knoweth a man the master whom he has not served, and who is a stranger unto him, and is far from the thoughts and intents of his heart?" How do we know God if we don't serve Him or think about Him often? How can we be like God if we don't serve Him or think about Him often? I know you know that it's impossible, and that's why you knew enough to ask the question in the first place--you know it's vital to draw nearer unto God. So how do we do that?

     Another favorite scripture is in 3 Nephi 9, when the land has gone dark after Christ's crucifixion and the people are mourning. In their despair, they hear the voice of the Lord telling them, "If ye will come unto me ye shall have eternal life. Behold, mine arm of mercy is extended towards you, and whosoever will come, him will I receive." To have eternal life, which is to know God, which is to be like God, we have to come unto Him, or come unto Christ. But His arm of mercy is extended, which means that He's waiting for us. I don't know why, but I always picture the Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban video game, where a book of spells would often be on a pedestal in the middle of a chasm, and you had to find a way to get to it. Christ is always there, always waiting for us, and it's up to us to go to Him.
     This still isn't digging, really, and I'm sorry to ramble. Here we go now: in my first weeks of the mission, I had a companion who wasn't too eager to work at that time. He wasn't obedient, he didn't seem to like me, and I had a very hard time with him. I was afraid to talk to him, and I could tell you more stories of why later. We eventually became friends, but during my training, we did almost nothing. But anyway, in the beginning, I was shocked that a missionary could be that...bleh. I was still stuck in the naive "all missionaries are amazing" mindset, and since we were the only Elders in this city, I just thought, "What in the world is wrong with him? How could this be happening? President Warne needs to know." Over the course of a week, I wrote down everything that my companion was doing wrong, all of the rules he was breaking, all of the ways he was mistreating me, on the last page of my planner. I wrote in tiny print, and I filled the page. I got to the ciber on Monday ready to type fire, but the Spirit stopped me.
     "Why are you doing this?" he asked.
     "Because this can't be happening. President needs to know."
     "What exactly are you hoping he will do?"
     I thought about it, but I couldn't come up with an answer. The Spirit was kind enough to offer suggestions. "Do you want him to go home?" No, that would crush him. "Do you want him to get transferred away?" No, I don't know the area well enough. "Do you want to be transferred away?" No, I love the people here and I'm not ready to go. "Do you want President to get mad at him?" No, because then he'd yell at me and it would get worse. "So what do you want?"
     After a long pause, I responded in my heart, "I guess I just want him to know what's going on. I want to know that he hears me and knows what I'm going through."
     Then the Spirit changed my life and especially my mission with this phrase: "That's why we pray."

     We pray because God listens and we need to remind ourselves of that. We pray because we want Him close to us and because we trust Him. We pray because we know He will be fair and will always do what is best for us. President Warne often said that there are three types of obedience: obedience because it's a commandment, because we want blessings, and because we love God. It's the same with prayer. I used to pray because I was supposed to, and I later prayed because I wanted to ask for things or even to feel the Spirit, but this experience was the first of many throughout my mission that remade who I am. I learned to pray because God is my Father, I love Him, and I want to be close to Him. I learned to pray about meaningless things, things that I couldn't imagine God caring about, but I learned that if it's big enough for you to care about, it's big enough for God. I learned to be honest with Him and be satisfied in turning only to Him when nobody else could help me.
     I learned that while God is my Father, He is also my friend.
     This experience didn't change whether or not I prayed, but it changed why I prayed, how I prayed, and even how often I prayed. It changed my heart and the way I saw my Father, and it made me feel indescribable love for Him. It made me trust Him. It made me want to be like Him. It made me want to know Him.
     I still read my scriptures and pray often, but not quite the same way as I used to, and I've been working on that. I noticed a slump in my spirituality, and I traced it back to this, always to this. Maybe the answer is different for you, but for me, when I want to come closer to my Father, I talk to Him. How can I know Him, be like Him, or feel close to Him if I don't keep Him close to me? So my advice is to dig deeper in your prayer and scripture study. The temple, service, fasting, and a million other things will certainly help you, but my testimony is that how close we feel with our Father greatly depends on how we talk to Him.

But in case all you needed was a list:
9 Ways to Draw Closer to God:
1. Sincerely and humbly pray.
2. Act promptly on spiritual impressions.
3. Search the scriptures daily.
4. Live the law of the fast.
5. Be worthy and worship in the temple.
6. “Trifle not with sacred things” (D&C 6:12).
7. Be prepared to move forward in faith.

8. Let the Lord decide the details of what He chooses to reveal and when He chooses to reveal it.

9. Heed prophetic warnings.

- Sister Linda K. Burton, Relief Society General President (2012 - present)


Konrie's Korner:

This time I am going to talk about something a little bit different from Richie. The first thought I had when you asked how to draw closer to God was to think of Him always. When I got back from my mission, one of my happiest times was when I was able to have my Father in Heaven constantly or at least frequently on my thoughts. I would just be walking to class and list all my blessings and feel the inspiration to stop for a half second to compliment someone going in the opposite direction. It was a time when people and little inspirations from the Spirit were the most important. I was so happy and so satisfied with life because I felt Heavenly Father working through me.

I have thought back on that time since then and wondered why I am not as happy as I was then, and I reached the conclusion, I used to cast my burdens upon the Lord. I trusted that if I followed His prompting to stop to talk to someone instead of head to class on time, He would help me to still understand what was going on. I had faith that if I magnified my calling despite being super busy, that I would have enough time in the day for everything important.

Sometimes I don't have that faith, sometimes the here and now distracts me from the eternal perspective of which things truly matter. It isn't the money or that grades but relationships and knowledge. I truly feel closest to God when I am taking care of His children and remembering Him in the little things. I love you, and I hope that this helps :)